The Old College Cry

Typecast Press isn’t forever.

We know that — though Mary and Shop Boy hope to keep at this printing thing for many more years.

Nope, one day, we’ll hang up our ink-stained, monkey-adorned aprons and pass all this great old machinery and printer stuff on to the next generation …

Whereupon someone will rename the business something high-falutin’ like Lord Fauntleroy Fine Stationers, Inc.

Oh, the big C&P will still cough and wheeze, the Miehle Vertical will still gush oil and mystery crud will occasionally fall from somewhere deep within the guillotine cutter onto your expensive paper. But somehow, it won’t be the same.

Sigh. You think of things like this when you pass certain milestones as a business owner. At least Shop Boy does. The latest is the departure of our longest-serving intern (and I mean 10 hours her first day, 11 her last), Katrina Miller — from Villa Julie College in Stevenson, Md.

Oh, wait a minute. That’s Stevenson University to you. Well, la-dee-stinkin’-da. They recently changed the name to make the school sound more important and … of course … to attract guys hesitant to attend a school named Julie. True, Shop Boy’s pals Tim Smith and Robert Leininger — fans of old movies featuring dead people — did nickname the place Villa Julie Newmar. Smart-alecks.

But don’t get Katrina going on this. Not when she’s holding an X-acto. Remember the scene in Fatal Attraction where the murderous Glenn Close is slicing the knife into her own flesh as she explains why everybody has to die? Pretty much Katrina talking about the name change.

Anyway, Villa Julie Stevenson is about to turn out a good one in Katrina, who enters her final year any day now. She came highly recommended, and leaves the same way. From cranking out coasters to scrubbing trays to teaching us a very slick method for lining envelopes with fancy paper — value added! — Katrina was great to have around. Funny. Dependable as heck. Eager to work. She even said that she likes Shop Boy’s collections of music.

Ahem.

Too bad Katrina’s got to go. Mary could learn a lot from her.